


Wish I Were Heather.

by holywaterspraybottle



Category: Hamilton - Fandom
Genre: Aha I had to integrate that Eliza was called Heather somehow so don't mind me, F/M, Hamliza sadly, Heartbreak, Inspired by Music, Sad John Laurens, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:20:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25141540
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holywaterspraybottle/pseuds/holywaterspraybottle
Summary: Aha I just listened to Heather by Conan Gray on repeat for an hour while I wrote this.I've always gotten heartbroken Laurens vibes from this so here you go.
Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler
Comments: 3
Kudos: 17





	Wish I Were Heather.

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy yall, some sad boy Laurens and ew Hamliza

The faint shine of the stars are my only source of light as I sit on my bed, scrolling through Instagram.

I see a selfie Peggy posted. She was at PinkBerry with 2 friends. It kinda looks like she's third wheeling- felt that.

Anyways, Peggy is a part of the Heathers. Well, the Schuyler Sisters. But y'know, an iconic trio, known by the whole school, of course they've picked up that nickname. They're nothing like them though. All three are basically, the nicest people ever. 

Double tap, I keep on scrolling.

Next I see Jefferson, recording James stirring macaroni and recreating that iconic vine. 

" That's what goods püssy sounds like"

"THOMAS!"

Welp. Like I would know.

Scroll.

Then I see her. Eliza. Wearing a sweater. Not any sweater. My- Alexander's sweater. The specific one.

_I still remember_

_Third of December_

_Me in your sweater_

_You said it looked better_

_On me, than it did you_

That sweater. It was basically mine. I wore it all the time. He let me. 

_Only if you knew_

_How much I liked you_

He was fucking clueless. Alex could figure out everything else in the world but not my feelings for him. 

_But I watch your eyes, as she_

_Walks by_

_What a sight for_

_Sore eyes_

_Brighter than a_

_Blue sky_

_She's got you_

_Mesmerized_

_While I die_

I seriously thought he felt the same way. I seriously fantasized at night. It was Alexander's eyes, as I romanticized. In a perfect world, he liked me back. He kissed me. Psssh, like that would ever happen. 

_Why would you ever kiss me?_

_I'm not even half, as pretty_

Exactly. She's beautiful, and I'm just this- this ugly piece of shit. That's not what's this is about. He gave me signs- I thought... I just...

And he gave her the one thing- the one fucking thing that gave me hope. And he kisses her cheek while she drapes it over her shoulders all cute and crap.

In a perfect world, that was me. I was sitting next to him on his bed, getting a kiss on my cheek, sweater draped over my shoulders. 

I build up the courage to confront him. I text him.

_You gave her your sweater-_

_-It's just polyester_

_But you like her better-_

_Read 11:56 pm_

_Wish I were Heather_

Yeah I do. I really do. 

Once again, In a perfect world, I'd be saying that at my wedding with Alexander. 

_Watch as she stands with_

_Her holding your hand_

_Put your arm 'round her shoulder_

_Now I'm getting colder_

I wrap up in my blanket, glossy eyes being lit up by the blue light my screen gives off.

_But how could I hate her?_

_She's such an angel_

She really is. Eliza's my friend. I can't hate her. I know it's not her fault. I know it's not her fault the guy I thought liked me back swoon over her. 

_But then again, kinda_

_Wish she were dead, as she_

_Walks by_

_What a sight for_

_Sore eyes_

_Brighter than a_

_Blue sky_

Yeah, that blue sweater of yours is really her color. 

_She's got you_

_Mesmerized_

_While I die_

My face starts to get cold, then I realize it's from the cool air from my fan against my face wet from tears. 

_Why would you ever kiss me?_

He would never. 

_I'm not even half, as pretty_

I look back at the texts.

_-You gave her your sweater_

_-It's just polyester_

_-But you like her better_

_Read 11:56 pm_

_I wish I were Heather_

_Wish I were Heather_

_Wish I were Heather_

Right now I wish Freaky Friday was real, I'd love to switch bodies with Eliza. Be in her spot.

_Why would you ever kiss me?_

_I'm not even half as pretty_

_You gave her your sweater_

_It's just polyester, but you like her better_

_Wish I were..._

Eliza. I wish I was fucking Eliza. My hand shakes as I press the 'block' button. Same for him.

My will to live is in love with someone else. Great. 

I flip over my pillow to the cold side, only to ruin that side with more tears.

**Author's Note:**

> So like yeah❤️
> 
> It pained me to write him all sad, but it's the song yknow 
> 
> Hope ya liked it 
> 
> <3


End file.
